Cursing Was Never the Problem. Respectability Was

James Baldwin's Apartment on the Upper West Side of Manhattan in New York City

The Roots of Cursing in Our Culture

Most curse words don't come from some evil place. The word "curse" traces back to Old English "curs," which is tied to the Latin "cursus," referring to the set of prayers read in church. Over time, it evolved into a formula recited to formally condemn someone. The word "damn" comes from the Latin "damnare," meaning to condemn. Even the S word started as a plain term for waste before it picked up weight over the centuries. These words began as simple expressions. They were made "bad" by those who decided what counted as proper.

This history matters because English itself was handed to us. The rules for what’s considered proper were handed to us too.

Cursing in the Black Community

Most elders in the Black village I grew up in cursed. My grandma, my auntie—these same women who cursed like sailors were often the ones ensuring the neighborhood kids' bellies stayed full. They were the ones you could confide in, the ones you trusted with your words. In Black culture, cursing has never automatically meant disrespect. It’s culture. Yes, culture.

Our attempts to refrain from cursing usually stem from a desire to fit into certain environments. Just like we talk "professionally" or turn away from our native accents. The mechanic everyone depends on curses too, and it never made him any less trusted.

The Double Standard of Language

Now, there’s cursing I do reject. I can’t stand the anomaly of calling our Black women terms built to devalue them. You don’t see that pattern in other races, calling their own women bitches or hoes, even in their own music. That has to be examined through a thick lens. For every cause during slavery, every act of dehumanization against Black people, there was an effect we got stuck in. This is modern-day brainwashing.

Cursing doesn’t define someone’s character. That belief itself is rooted in a European thought process. We should judge people in our diaspora by their character, not their vocabulary.

Embracing Our Language

Even I try to control my language today, especially around elders. But at the end of the day, I am who I am. I probably inherited my language from my grandmother. Not sure whose is worse. But what else did I take from her? Her love for helping others. Her love for community. Her love for family.

So if someone curses, don’t degrade them for it. Don’t shy away from mentoring a child who’s picked up language that isn’t fit for public view. I’ve seen this used as a lackluster reason the church stays distant from our youth. But if they got to know them, if they actually sat with each other, they’d find they can coexist without cursing being the wall between them.

The Importance of Connection

Somewhere right now, there’s a loving mother, auntie, or grandmother taking care of those damn kids. They’re the backbone of our community. They teach us resilience, love, and the importance of connection.

Cursing is just a part of our expression. It’s a reflection of our experiences, our struggles, and our triumphs. We should embrace it, not shun it. Let’s honor our language, our culture, and our people.

In a world that often seeks to silence us, let’s make sure our voices are heard. We have stories to tell, and they matter. Let’s preserve our legacy and empower each other through authentic expression.

Conclusion: Language as a Tool for Empowerment

Language is a powerful tool. It can uplift or demean, connect or divide. In our community, it’s essential to recognize that cursing is not the issue; respectability politics are. We need to celebrate our language, our culture, and our history.

Let’s not forget the importance of community. We are stronger together. We can build a future where our voices are celebrated, not silenced. So, let’s keep speaking our truth, cursing included. It’s all part of who we are.

---wix---